Thursday, January 28, 2010

Happy Gotcha Day, Hoss

Today is January 28th, 2010, which commem-
orates "Hoss'" 13th Happy Gotcha Day. Hoss has had a very rough year and finds himself 1,100 miles from home.
Normally, our Happy Gotcha Days are celebrated as a family, together. This year is very different. It seems this very day may be a large part of the reason we are separated.

When we adopted "Hoss", 13 years ago, we would never have dreamed we would find ourselves where we are; separated.

But we have come to learn, separation is not always a bad thing. It always hurts, but the outcome can surpass what was.
For any parent who finds themselves having to "tough love" their child, they know the immense grief and pain that every picture and memory invokes. The "whys" are quick to come. The tears are even quicker.

BUT, we serve a God of healing. We have no doubt God is using this in "Hoss'" life to make him reach down deeper than he ever has and deal with thoughts, feelings, emotions, rejection, etc. that he has bottled up for too long.

And, God is using this is our lives.

Mr. Cartwright has risen to a level of leadership in his family that he has never exhibited before. He loves so much better. He is a better listener. He is a better Daddy. He is a better MAN!

Myself? Well, I have had an encounter with a Jesus that I only somewhat knew. Now, don't get me wrong, I thought I knew Him very well. I had my "quiet time" most days, said my "prayers", taught my children, loved my husband, served the body of Christ, etc. But, I have come to know that my acts were of naught, because my heart was not where my Savior wanted it to be. I really want to KNOW my Lord. I want to have passion for Him that exudes from my every cell. I want my life to be a light. This is where the Lord has brought me as my oldest, precious one has been stripped from my heart and arms, though, be it temporarily.

The other three "Cartwrights" have had to deal with many emotions and pain, that I would give my life to take from them. BUT we must remember, God will use this in their lives as well. They must learn to trust our Sovereign Master. Prayer has become a very important part of their lives. Difficult times will come in the future. God must remain their source of strength.

For those of you wanting to know how "Hoss" is doing, God is working. He is making good strides and coming along slowly. We talk to him every 2 weeks and, Lord willing, we will visit him in late May. At that time, we will be spending most of our visit with him talking. Please be in prayer that he will open up and be open. We want our relationship healed. Our son is a treasure, not lost, just wandering.

We miss him....every day.

Holy Spirit, please do the work only you can do. His heart needs breaking and mending. This is a task that we entrust into your hands. Please continue to mold us and make us into the image of the One who gave His life for us.


amy said...

My prayers are with you for your family and your son. Our God is a redeemer and I am praying peace for you. Bless you and your family.

Melody said...

I found your blog tonight and wanted you to know that I hope and intend to remember to pray for your son more than just tonight. I'm sorry for the pain involved here and can only imagine how difficult that must be. May the Holy Spirit overwhelm your son with his love tonight and reveal himself in new and fresh ways.

Yo Mama said...

Yes, Lord Jesus. We stand in agreement. Have your way, give strength where it is needed, comfort where it's required, hope when things seem hopeless. Be all the "Cartwrights" need.

You are all dearly loved.