Loneliness Cries Out!

I think one of the worst pains to a parent's heart is knowing your child is hurting and in pain themselves. We want to fix things so they don't have to feel that emptiness or loneliness. We want to fill their hearts with love and if we know that love won't fill it we give them things to make them smile. But eventually, the pain comes back.

This year has been tough for some young 'uns on the Ponderosa. New loves have left. New relationships didn't last. Life throws a curve ball. Accidents happen. The story doesn't end as lovely as one may picture, although I know the story's not over yet.

My littlest's two best friends moved away in February. God brought two new friends and they are leaving at the end of this week. For another state. Her neighbor friend is moving. So it was no wonder that the entire way home from church she cried out the window saying, "I want a puppy!" (Her love languages is obviously anything animal related.) Tears flowed hard! It is so so hard to see

Loss comes hard to this love of mine. She takes these very seriously and feels the deep separation!

(I know you are thinking how nice it would be to end this post with a picture of a cute little puppy that she has adopted!) Not so fast....

I can promise you, THAT CANNOT AND WILL NOT HAPPEN!!!

But what I can tell her that I know to be true is that Jesus is the best friend we can have. In fact, He is our Good Shepherd that promises to never leave His sheep.

My prayer is that through these losses she will feel the emptiness that only Jesus can fill. Sooner than later.

For later will bring so much more pain.

Lord, as this week begins and our friends move on and start new relationships elsewhere, I pray for your special healing touch to my little one's heart. May this be the year that the Truth, the Way and the Life become real to her. Open her eyes to your love for her, and help her to know you are always there for her and will never move away or leave her. Show her stability through this is from you. May she feel your arms around her and assurance of your acceptance of  her little life as she confesses you before others and seeks forgiveness for her sins. Thank you for being that constant to Your children."

P.S. Please give this momma patience through this too. As the meltdowns occur, give me compassion to feel as she feels.

Keep Making Me

My new favorite song. Keep Making Me, by Sidewalk Prophets, is an amazing prayer of humility. So often in life we want the cush, the glamour, and the ease. But, really friends, we know this is not the path to true Godliness. Suffering is the means to being more like Christ. 

"Make me broken, so I can be healed

(Repentance is a true sign of brokenness)

'Cause I'm so calloused, and now I can't feel

I want to run to You with heart wide open

Make me broken."

(This I ask of God to become a prayer from my boys' heart.)

Make me empty, so I can be filled

'Cause I'm still holding onto my will

(Empty? Really? These are the petitions that the world does not understand.)

And I'm completed when you are with me

Make me empty.

'Til You are my one desire; 'til You are my one true love

(He must be first in everything. Oh, Lord, please remove the idols in my life.)

'Til You are my breath, my everything

Lord, please keep making me.

Make me lonely, so I can be Yours.

(Loneliness is where we find our desperate need for Christ.)

'Til I want no one more than You, Lord.

'Cause in the darkness, I know You will hold me.

Make me lonely.