"Inger", "Marie", and I have been reading through the biography of Amy Carmichael, one of my favorite missionary stories. She was a single woman who believed in God to provide her every need as she led the "Starry Cluster", an evangelistic endeavor in India, and then opened her home to be "Amma" for many orphaned girls. She left her home in Bristol, England, in her mid twenties and never stepped foot there again.
Today as we read our chapter, Tied at the Feet, I was challenged in my view of motherhood. In India when a woman becomes a mother, she is said to be tied at the feet. This phrase can conjure up an image of increasing burden, yet, Amy chose to embrace it as a gift. So I ask myself, "Do I?"
My morning today was one of conflict with my littlest. Lots of privileges relinquished. Lots of defiance. She struggles so much in school to embrace me as her teacher and I find myself questioning my involvement in this area. (Mostly out of frustration.) My patience was gone and I found myself responding in emotion and feeling intense burden....to be done with this. Thinking, how am I to get through this? It then brings up my sin, inadequacies and areas that need growth. And I'm tied. The knots are tight and I see the marks along my ankles. They even seem to be cutting off circulation. But I find it's my perspective.
After I took this to the Lord, He showed me the beautiful, pink (I choose this color because it's "Ingrid's" favorite) bow that wound itself gracefully at my feet. And I came to the conclusion that it is more like a two legged race. My feel being tied to my Saviors. Making sure I'm walking in sync with Him. Loving my munchkin' with only the love he can give.
I know all children deal with defiance to their parents, but being the mother of adopted children has a rejection dimension to it. Three out of our four children have struggled and strained CONTINUALLY against the parents God has given them. I don't handle that well and the only way to keep loving is to focus on my partner in this race. Hanging on to the Lord. Grabbing Him around the waist, and running this race with Him.
Amy did it without a husband because she had her Savior. She chose to be tied at the feet as she adopted these orphans and loved them through thick and thin of persecution, sickness and joy. What an example she has given to us.
1 comment:
Sarah, Your children are blessed beyond measure to have a mother like you and a father like David! Growing up is so hard. Your house is like a lighthouse full of God's love they need through their individual journeys. God bless you as you parent each of them with such love and grace.
Love you,Patty
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