The New Doooo!

My beautiful 12 year old.

You've come a long way, baby! I love you, "Marie".

Listening Big

Each morning my treasures and I have Bible around our kitchen table. We are reading through the book of John. We each take a verse and we read through one chapter a day. Each person, then, explains a verse that they took notice of, or an attribute of God. Today was no different.

John 10

"Mrs. Cartwright":

"John 10:28 reminds us that once we are God's sheep, nothing can change that. 'and I give eternal life to them, and they will never perish; and no one will snatch them out of My hand.' Nothing can take us out of the fold...but we must be part of the true fold to begin with. Does this mean we can live any way we want to and hold to this promise. NO! We must always be examining our lives to see if our fruit is in line with true conversion. Our hearts desires must be to relinquish all sin and strive for holiness. We will continue to sin until we are in heaven, but are we relying on Christ and wanting to please him?"

Then I reminded them of the interview of Tullian Tchividjian (part 1 and part 2) that we listened to on Sunday. He prayed a prayer at 6 years old, but wasn't saved until he was 21. Saying a prayer doesn't save you, trusting in Christ and bearing fruit is evidence of a change.

"Little Joe":

"Jesus says I am the Good Shepherd."

"Marie":

"The religious leaders wanted to kill Jesus, but it wasn't His time yet."

"Inger":

"Mommy, can I say something?" (Usually she has a hard time paying attention to the hard words, but today was something different.)"It was wintertime, Mommy."

I looked at her and wondered where in the world she got that from. Lo, and behold, there it was staring me in the face. John 10:23, "It was winter...." (Although, she is my nature lover...that word must have jumped out at her.)

Just a reminder to me of the little details that matter. One day, my prayer is that these little lambs will have a strong desire to inductively study the Word of God. One little fact that mattered to place the context of this passage.

Jesus, bend my lambs' hearts to you.

The Life Cycle...Through the Eyes of a 5 Year Old

Yesterday, the last day of summer before school started, my girls and I were having our daily "book fix".

They each bring a pile of library books to my bed and we enjoy reading together. As their heads rest on my shoulders, I pause to muse that this will not last forever.

There is usually a vast difference in the subject matter of the books.

Insects, bugs, anything animalia. ("Inger's choice)

OR

Books with beautiful pictures whether true or fiction. ("Marie's" choice)

My little "Inger" is my animal lover. As we stopped to read a book about vesperids (snakes with poison and pits) we found out they eat frogs. "Inger" stopped me and informed me that is good because frogs eat butterflies. And we DON'T want butterflies eaten. Little did she know she was reporting on the life cycle of the insect world.

"Marie" endures and waits eagerly for her next pick.

Chocolate Comes in All Colors

My oldest daughter, "Marie", asked me this week if "Hoss" is mad at her. I am so sad to think she even ponders this.

As I explained where his anger is aimed, our conversation meandered over to her own adoption. The questions came quickly.

"Did my birth mom love me?" "Could she really not take care of me?" "Do I have other brothers and sisters?" "Did she know Jesus?"

So, for the first time I told how her BM was trying to find peace in all the wrong things: alcohol, drugs, etc. She told me that scared her.

But then I was able to bring her around to how grateful I am that Jesus handpicked her for our own. How she wouldn't have heard about Jesus. Providentially, we are reading, Dori, A Girl Nobody Loved. I was able to remind her of this and how her life could have been so different. She pondered. She was trusting.

We talked about the different shades of color that our family represented. She wanted to know what colors each of the birth parents were for her family.

Together we came up with this list:

"Hoss" and "Marie": milk chocolate

"Little Joe": Dark Chocolate

"Inger": Dark Chocolate with nuts (gotta love it)

Daddy: Chocolate swirled with caramel

She looked me straight in the face and said, "You are white chocolate, Mommy."

And this I am proud to be.

Noises at the Ponderosa

No one wants to admit it.

There is a common theme that runs through every home.

Many people call it by different names: toot, pass gas, cut the cheese and even the "f--t" word.

But it is a sad commentary that it brings the most laughter.

That as I am putting my little princesses to bed, (no brother attending this time), I hear the deep giggling that makes me laugh. I wonder what has brought it on.

Need I ask.

"Fuzzy", the wolf cub, just let one.

P.S. I apologize to those of you who don't see this as humorous....

Mommy's Helper

My Dear Marie,

I know your heart's desire. You see, mine was the same. I remember being your age and all I wanted to do was grow up and be a mommy and wife. You must keep your eyes on the Lord and seek first his kingdom. Do your best to honor and obey your mom and dad to prepare you for the greatest role you will have one day. It is the greatest role!

The Lord has created you with such a precious spirit that will one day be a gift to the Godly man God brings your way. Every day I pray for you and your future. He will provide you with exactly what you will need. You have so many gifts that can be cultivated and used to glorify your Savior. Keep up the cheerful heart ever relying on Jesus.

Marie, you are a gift from above. No man knows the miracle God has done in your life. The world says you have nothing to offer. The world says you won't accomplish anything. God says, "Trust in Me and I will direct your paths."

I love you dear daughter and am honored to be your Mom.

High Tea

This past weekend the girlies and I had a day together. So often I think, unfortunately, about what I can get done when I have time, instead of investing in their lives. So, before time escaped I promised them a "high tea" with their American Girl doll friends.

I busied myself getting ready, while they got dressed and fixed their "friend's" hair and clothes.

(Just a note: if you are ever wanting to put on a tea and don't want to spend tons of money, Ross' Stores have great little tea snacks.)

We had a grand time. As we were talking I asked my girls if there friend knew Jesus. I thought this is a good safe way to discuss how to share our faith. And the conversation that followed was very insightful. I wonder if role playing always brings out thoughts and feelings that may not be discussed otherwise.

"Marie" said, 'Yes, Kit knows Jesus and has been wanting to lead a Bible Study with her friends, but has been scared to.'

So my thoughts go to the afternoons that our two little neighbor girls come over. They are from unsaved homes and there has been a couple of times I have had to address issues that are not appropriate for my girls. I think dear little Kit's thoughts have been inside of my "Marie". I intend to address this.

Next, "Inger" tells me, 'Samantha is ready to sleep without the night light on.' Can you guess where my little sweetie is struggling? She wants to be that big girl, but we are not quite there yet.

I think this will come soon. For if Samantha is ready, maybe she is too.

Happy Gotcha Day, "Marie"!

This adorable little button came into our lives 10 years ago today. She came with many needs and through the Lord's help has overcome so much.

"Marie",

Our hearts desire for you is that you grow in the knowledge and grace of our Savior. You have become a beautiful young woman who openly shares her heart with us. Thank you. You challenge us to challenge ourselves. God has a special plan for you, Princess.

Keep your heart soft toward Him. For He is your Creator and Sustainer. He will give you the grace to endure what will come your way.

Keep your eyes focused on Him. For the world will try to entice you away. Don't get distracted, love.

Keep your mind aimed on Him. He wants you pure and clean. Remember He made you just the way He wants you and you truly are beautiful. Your heart is precious. Your loving spirit glorifies the Lord.

One day, God may give you little ones, for we know this is your heart's desire. We love to watch you at church loving on all the babies, preferring to be with them over your peers. God's greatest gift to you is this desire to be a Mommy one day. Keep praying and accepting His will. Your own Mommy had this desire. It came in the form of a special little girl. We thank God for you every day.

We love you.

My Little Bread Bakers

Here are my favorite little bakers!

They Are Listening!

"Mommy, Mommy, there's a spider guarding her egg sac!"

"There was a messy spider web out by the swingset."

"Look up, Mommy. There is a paper wasp nest."

These lovely words may not seem like much to you, but they proclaim to me loud and clear that my littlest one is listening, listening very closely.

This year I am using Christian Liberty Press Nature Readers for my beautiful little women to explain to them the wonders of creation and most importantly the wonders of The Creator. I supplement it with library books on each topic.

I am blessed to be able to be the one hearing these words and seeing the wonder in their eyes as we unfold the beauty around us.....in bugs.

It Is So Sweet

....to hear my two little women humming, 'Tis So Sweet To Trust in Jesus, while they play Little Mommies.

May they have that precious song on their lips even when they become Mommies.

So, they force me to think heartily on those words...do I trust? Is it sweet?


’Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just to take Him at His Word; (May I not believe the lies)
Just to rest upon His promise,
And to know, “Thus saith the Lord!”

Refrain:
Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him!
How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er; (He has proven Himself more)
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!
Oh, for grace to trust Him more!

Oh, how sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just to trust His cleansing blood;
And in simple faith to plunge me
’Neath the healing, cleansing flood!

Yes, ’tis sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just from sin and self to cease; (He must give the grace to change)
Just from Jesus simply taking
Life and rest, and joy and peace.

I’m so glad I learned to trust Thee, (There are days I have learned, and days it feels like I'm drowning)
Precious Jesus, Savior, Friend;
And I know that Thou art with me,
Wilt be with me to the end. (Thank you for never leaving me, Savior)

Imagine Real Hard

Close your eyes.

Imagine you have stepped back in time to the mid-1800's. You have entered the home of the Ingalls family....

I am pleased to introduce you to Mary and Laura Ingalls. Can't you see the resemblance? They both have beautiful long flowing golden brown hair. After all, they live on the Ponderosa, don't they?

A Radical Transformation

For those of you who ever wondered why African American little girls' hair is always done up so fantastically, here is the answer to your question. It just can't NOT be done....

THE BEFORE

AND AFTER!

This, here, Adoption Mama is learning quite a bit about how to care for my darling Black Beauties. I would never change what God has blessed my life with.

("Mr. Cartwright", on the other hand, prays that nothing will ever happen to his wife!)

It's Here...Ready or Not!

Today is our first day of school. We are starting a tad early so more flexibility can happen throughout the school year.

In many ways I am ready. Schedule and discipline invigorate the body and soul.

In other ways I am not. My emotions can take over at times and my bed calls from afar and bids me to come and stay for the day. But this I must fight.

"Little Joe", "Marie", and "Inger" are ready. They are a privilege to teach. They bring much joy to each day.

This year we attempt a few new features:

~ a weekly nature walk and nature notebook

~ "Little Joe" is taking a science class taught by a wonderful Christian home school mom. This year it is General Science by Apologia.

~ "Inger" is starting kindergarten. She is elated.

~ Each morning we will have table time, which will include memory work (multiplication tables, Bible passages, catechism), praying for other countries using Window on the World, and art.

Along with the joys, there are many remembrances that "Hoss" is not with us again. We eagerly wait for his return. This will happen in time when the Lord sees fit.

For now we wait and pray.

Fishers of Men

It was a beautiful day out. As the Ponderosa headed out to fish, my heart's prayer was that my little people would see their Mama fishing for men, too.

We spent a couple hours at the pond hoping there would be some bites. No fish seemed to need our food we were supplying. Do those out in the "big pond" know that we have the Bread of Life? Do they realize we have the answer to their hunger and thirst? Do we tell them? This can help you as you attempt to help them see that they even have a need.

Finally, we had a couple of nibbles; just a couple of beautiful baby bluegills. My little women caught them. O, Master, give my daughters hearts of truth. Give them courage to stand strong in a world of hate and lawlessness. Give them love for the lawless.

Their hands are small, but can learn so much. Timing is the key to fishing. They must learn how to watch the bobber, and gently, pull the line in. Father God, give my children discernment to know truth from lies. Keep their eyes focused on you and not the world around them.

Giver of life, help us to be in the world and not of it. May we not be so separated that we fear coming nose to nose with unbelievers. Help us to love those of the world, by having compassion on their souls, not condemning them for their way of life. For we were once with out You, and you showed us much mercy.

The leader of the Ponderosa has always loved fishing, both for fish and men. He has been such an amazing example to this family as he has such compassion for the needs of the lost, and doesn't hesitate to share the truth of God's Word with others.

God Almighty, grant my husband the courage to lead this little flock.

The Ponderosa Artist

"Inger" is quite the four year old artist. I may be slightly bias...but you must admit, these pictures are quite the rendition of "Little Joe", "Marie", and "Inger".

My Beautiful Little Lambs

My Beautiful Little Woman turns 11

So much has happened in the little life of my oldest daughter.

Her journey began 11 years ago today, in not so good circumstances. Though I did not know her then, I can guarantee she was a fighter. She came into this world weighing 4pounds and measuring 16 inches. She appeared little, but inside she was gargantuan.
Joustled from home to home, there was not much stability in her life.

We met her 20 months later; she moved in a couple months after that meeting. Already having two rambunctious boys, little "Marie" brought a much needed respite to the Ponderosa. There were many hurdles for this little one to overcome. Developmentally she gained 15 months in the first 6 months she lived in our home. One and one-half years after she became our daughter, we discovered she had ACC. This added to the already present struggles, which included, FAE.

But my girl is a fighter. She has confounded the doctors time and again. God has truly performed many miracles in her little body.

When thinking about my precious now 11 year old, these are the things that come to mind:

~ always thinking of others
~ deep, insightful prayers that are way above her age capabilities
~ sweet spirit
~ inner driving that pushes her to not give up
~ her desire to be a mommy one day (I like to remember this one as the righteous anger builds up in me of the memory of our OLD pediatrician giving me the "talk" concerning birth control for HER, at 8 years old, stating that, "She won't ever be able to take care of children". This Dr. doesn't know my God!)
~ hearing her sing during chores

~ Most of all, her reading the Bible, something that other doctors said she would never be able to do.

Much time has passed. Many special memories have passed, too. But we continuing making them. Our sweetie and her love for Jesus make each day worth the struggles of teaching her.

Things are hard for her...lots of times....but I keep reminding her that Jesus can do far more than anyone ever expects...even in her little life.

Happy Birthday, Princess Star, Mookey Bear! We love you!

Contented Heart = Thankful Heart

helpful little ones

my diligent man....he allows me to stay home and has never complained about working every day

religious freedom and freedom in Christ

hearing my "Marie" pray

the joy in "Little Joe's" eyes when he plays trumpet

my precious nephews and nieces

the continuous blessings of Christ (Romans 7)

the Titus 2 Women in my life

Susan Heck

bouncing beads...when my littlest one runs through the house, you always know where she is!

the tender kiss of my love

raindrops after many nights of hard freezes

then the sun coming out

Our Beautiful Piano Player ~ Christmas Rectial